Wednesday, November 26, 2014

Chinese Translation of "Yo soy un hombre sincero"

我是一個誠實的人,來自椰子的故鄉,但凡我在人世,就把心上的歌兒高唱。我曾涉足天南海北,今後還將雲遊四方,千支歌中我是一曲,萬峰之中我是一座山崗。無論奇花還是異草,我都曉得它的怪名,無論上當還是受騙,我均深知它的苦痛。我曾見黑夜之中聖潔的美女將純真之光溫柔地灑在我的額頭上。我曾見漂亮女人的肩頭上生長出會飛的翅膀,瓦礫廢墟之上亦有蝴蝶在飛翔:我曾見一位男子生活孤寂,一把匕首形影不離.令他心灰意冷的美女,永遠不再把她的名字提起。靈魂的顯現光一般地迅疾,我曾兩度看到它的底細:一次是可憐的父親彌留之際,一次是她道聲再見,離我去。我曾搖撼那扇籬笆,是在葡萄園的門口,因為可恨的蜜蜂,蜇傷了我女兒的頭。我曾品嚐過一次享受,一次從未有過的享受,那是當法官一邊哭泣一邊宣判我的時侯。隔著海洋越過大地,我聽到有人在嘆氣,不,那不是嘆氣,是我兒躁動欲醒的鼻息。如果有人對我說:“去,拿走世界上最好的寶貝!”我將選擇一位真誠的朋友,而不去把愛情加以理會。我曾見受傷的蒼鷹,翱翔在萬裡晴空;亦曾見噴毒的蛇​​​​蠍,死於自己的巢穴。我曉得即使世界長眠,一片昏暗,萬物靜寂之時也會聽到溫順的小溪流水潺潺。天上的星辰失去了光輝,恰巧隕落於我家的荊扉;我驚喜交加,不知所措,竟用僵直的手將它撫摸。在我憤怒的胸膛,隱藏著刺痛的哀傷。被奴役人民之子生活只有這樣:或是沉默,或是死亡。一切,都美好而久長,一切,都和諧而舒暢,一切,都酷似那金剛,原來是炭,倘若失去了光。我曉得愚頑之輩的隆重葬禮,豪華奢侈,哀樂四起;也曉得墓地結出碩果,將會超出一般的土地。我沉默不語,心明眼亮,不再讓韻律的馬達隆隆作響。我將脫下博士服,把它掛在一棵枯萎的樹上。

http://meii.zcom.tw/000htm/Petitgrain%20Essential%20Oil%20.htm

Last month, I offered a very conventional Chinese translation of José Martí's "Cultivo una rosa blanca." "Conventional" is here used as the highest praise that can be bestowed on such an exercise. There is nothing in the least jarring about that translation; it does not depart an iota from the sense of the original and preserves all the external components of the poem that can be preserved; it is, in short, faithful. Martí's poem makes its journey to Cathay in a Chinese junk, but it arrives intact and even unrumpled. It is a very different experience from what awaited "Yo soy un hombre sincero" on its own journey to the Mystical Kingdom. This translation is still recognizable; but it is not fully comprehensible. It is imbued with a certain character of its own which even in the literal English translation sounds distinctly Oriental, or mock Oriental, anyway. I am wary to point out its idiosyncrasies lest I deprive the reader of the pleasure of discovering them for himself. Let me say on my word that I have added nothing to the original translation and that I am as astonished as you will be by the layers of meaning and unmeaning which the anonymous translator has uncovered. More than once I have had to pause to consider the viability of these alternative readings. Can someone from a different culture (or a different planet, for that matter) interpret a poem in new and original ways because his perspective differs from ours and most importantly from the author's? And are these insights to be ignored or discounted because they are drawn from a different well of experience? One might as well assert that Americans should not write haiku or Japanese violinists play Beethoven. Cultural imperialism cannot be allowed to replace political imperialism. Certainly, Martí of all people should be the last hostage to be taken in that archaic conflict. So I ask the reader to consider the following translation with an open mind, out of respect for the translator and in tribute to Martí. [Upon further research I have found other Chinese translations of this poem, and include in brackets an interesting variant on the second verse, which manages to be quite conventional until the very last word].

I am an honest man,
home from coconut,
whenever I am in the world,
put the heart of the song children sing.

I had to get involved in many,
the future will wander,
one thousand is a song I,
I was one among Wanfeng hill.

[I will once step in all over the country,
from now on also wander the four directions,
in thousand songs I will be a tune,
in ten thousand peaks I was a hump.]

Whether or exquisite Yi Cao,
I know it's a strange name,
regardless fooled or deceived,
I know it's all pain.

I have seen the beauty
of the holy darkness,
pure light gently sprinkler
on my forehead.

I have seen the growth
of a beautiful woman
on the shoulders of fly wings,
also on the rubble butterfly flying:

I have seen a man living lonely,
a dagger inseparable.
Beauty made him frustrated,
never mention her name.

Generally light show swift soul,
I see it's the bottom line twice:
once poor father dying,
and once she say good-bye, off I go.

I was shaking the fence door
is the door of the vineyard,
as hateful bees stings
my daughter's head.

I have tasted a pleasure,
never had time to enjoy it
while weeping when the judge
sentenced me at the right time.

Across the ocean, across the earth,
I heard someone sigh,
no, that's not a sigh,
I want to wake up the children restless breath.

If someone said to me:
"Go, take the world's best baby!"
I will choose a sincere friend,
and not to be ignored to love.

I have seen the injured eagle,
flying in clear blue skies;
see spray poisonous snakes
have also scorpion died own lair.

I know that even the world's buried,
a dark, quiet
when things will hear
the gentle gurgling brook.

Lost glory of the stars of heaven,
as it happens in my house fall
Jing Fei; my surprise Cross, overwhelmed,
actually with stiff hands stroked it.

In my anger chest,
tingling hidden grief.
Son of enslaved peoples living the only way:
either silence or death.

All are beautiful and long long,
everything is harmonious and comfortable,
all, are exactly like that of King Kong,
the original charcoal, if the loss of the light.

I know a grand funeral foolish generation,
and a touch of luxury, dirge everywhere;
also know the cemetery to fruition,
it will go beyond the general land.

I was silent, and think clearly,
no longer let the rhythm of motor rumble.
I will take off Dr. clothes,
hang it on a withered tree.


8 comments:

Vana said...

Manuel:

King Kong? Coconut? this is laughable my friend, the whole thing is a garbled mess! Poor Marti, the Chinese destroyed his verses. Though as you said they did justice to Cultivo una Rosa Blanca, this one leaves a bitter aftertaste.

Manuel A.Tellechea said...

Vana:

I am hoping that it was the re-translation from the Chinese to English that accounts for most of these misreadings. I might point out, also, that the Chinese translator admittedly did not use Martí's Spanish version to translate the poem, but worked from my own English translation. It is not the best course to use the back of a tapestry as your model when weaving a copy of the original. If it is available, use the original as your starting point and do not resort to any other translation unless you are in doubt about the meaning; but if your own translation differs markedly from those of others, stop to consider what is the most reasonable choice. If "King Kong" crops up in your translation — which apart from its inappropriateness is also an anachronistic allusion (Martí having died 38 years before King Kong was introduced in the movie of that name) — then consider whether you really want the Beast to Kill Beauty in this poem. Other errors may be more excusable. There might be only one pictograph in Chinese for both "palm" and "coconut," and I bet that Cubans today wished that our country were indeed "the land where 'coconuts' grow." But, as Martí, said: "The wine of the palm tree is bitter, but it is our wine."

The funniest unintentional error is found in the last stanza. In the original, Martí writes that he will hang his doctoral hood from a withered tree branch, meaning that he is not going to write academic poetry but the kind that is natural, heartfelt and spontaneous. In the Chinese translation, however, Martí takes off much more than his doctoral hood: "I will take off Dr. clothes, hang it from a withered tree." Thus is Martí turned into more of a "naturalist" than he actually was, a new Adam more reminiscent of Walt Whitman than our poet.

One stanza is translated to my liking: "I will once step in all over the country,//from now on also wander the four directions,//in thousand songs I will be a tune,//in ten thousand peaks I was a hump." Here everything goes more or less well till the very last word ("hump").

Vana said...

Manuel:

I swear I'm still laughing at this attempt by the Chinese, right you are when you say- they should have used the original, but your own translation is spot on, hump, hahaha, bet you after they were done with this translation, they stood there scratching their heads.

Thank you my friend, I got a kick out of this one.

Manuel A.Tellechea said...

Vana:

From hours of searching the internet I have come to the conclusion that all translations of Martí's Versos sencillos undertaken since 1997 (when my own English translation was published) have used my version not only as a model but in preference to the original. I know this for a fact because all foreign translators reproduce my English version alongside their own and credit me accordingly. The reason, I suppose, that my translation is used as the basis for other translations is that English, not Spanish, is the lingua franca of the 21st century. There are surely a myriad times more speakers of English in China than of Spanish, and the same holds true everywhere else in the world, though the disparity may not be quite as staggering as in China.

It is highly gratifying to me that my translation has contributed to the greater diffusion of Martí's works not only in the English-speaking world, as was my hope, but also far beyond.

Knowing, then, the responsibility that I bear for the accuracy of my English translation, I have re-translated my English version back into Spanish using the Google Translator, and the resulting version is identical to the original except for the lost rhyme.

So, like you, I am inclined to think that this Chinese rendering did not suffer too much by translating my English version of the poem into Chinese.

The wide discrepancies between the two translations are due, perhaps, to our inability to "tap" into the Chinese language, and not so much the Chinese translator's deficiencies in English or Spanish. The only way to know for sure is for me to learn Chinese, and I'm afraid that there isn't room left in my head to accommodate much a feat without displacing vital information that I may never be able to assimilate again.

So this mystery, which, I'm afraid, interests only us, will remain as inscrutable as much of this Chinese "re-interpretation" of "Yo soy un hombre sincero."

Vana said...

Manuel:

The Chinese must recognize that translating the words of the Apostle is meaningful, therefore the attempt, wish they would have done them justice.

You gave me a chuckle with the idea of learning Chinese, at this time in our lives it would not be an easy feat.

Thanks my friend.

Manuel A.Tellechea said...

Vana:

I though you might enjoy this quote from the Scottish philosopher George MacDonald (1824-1905), which is so much in the spirit of Martí:

"If instead of a gem, or even a flower, we should cast the gift of a loving thought into the heart of a friend, that would be giving as the angels give."

http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/authors/g/george_macdonald.html

Vana said...

Manuel:

Beautiful quote, indeed it would be the gift of angels.

Thank you my friend, your words always move me, like a gem or a flower.

Manuel A.Tellechea said...

Vana:

I think you would be interested in this. I just posted it today:

The Lives Grandfather Saved or Tried to Save